The Huge Tiny Littles

The house was cleaned, table set, Christmas tree and décor just right.
The food prepared, guest gifts wrapped, games planned even the music played softly in the background.
For this 12 year old, the long awaited day had arrived. She had chosen what clothes she would wear, hand made the invitations, even instructed her siblings and parents how to behave.
The clock in the hallway with each tick, tick, tick, would soon be announcing her guests and she was ready.
Ready for the curtain to raise so her Christmas party of wonderful delight could begin. But the curtain didn’t raise, no one came.
The maybe they’re just late thoughts disappeared in sorrow as 45 minutes latter still no one came.
She could feel the tears coming as she ran to her room, closed the door, laid on her bed and with covers over her head, cried into the little blanket she had, had since a child.
Broken heart tears that begged the “how come they didn’t come” questions. Hot tears that scream how come nobody likes me?
It is the song of this moment and it is sad, It is the realist of sad's for each particle of each second is felt in full measure of sorrow, sorrow on top of sorrow more than the heart can hold and it breaks out in tears that feel like it could fill an ocean.
In her tears she turns to Jesus her heavenly Papa. Why Lord didn’t they come? Why, why?
Exhausted in sorrow with her heart she can hear him say, I am with you, I love you, you are so dear, every tear every tiny part of every sorrow you feel I feel, I am here, right here, for you.
Let go into me your heart of hurt, let it rest in me, see that I am holding you.
You are so incredibly precious, so loved, so cherished. Feel that I am living, breathing, and in my breathing you are in the most deepest part of my heart of hearts.
The sad song of this moment I hold and I put it and you in the deepest love of all that I am. It doesn’t make it go away but where it is in me is so full of my love for you, you don’t have to hold it. Let it go in me. See how I hold and feel every tiny bit of it.
I take your very real sorrow song of this moment and hold it with my huge orchestra of my love. For love will always do far more than sorrow wants to destroy.
Look for me, for I am the great GOD that specializes in the little's that are huge.
I will provide little ways to help you through. The little ways will not always fix everything the way you want it, but they will be so full of me, they will make you feel you are known and not alone, that you are loved by me and that I am always, always, caring about you every second.
Can you see your sorrow placed in my love?
Can you see that it is so deep in me?
Can you see that in me is so much love that the sorrow is small in comparison, yet fully valued.
There is not a single part of who you are ,that I do not fully love, when you hurt in any way I fully, fully, fully, know it and love you.
Every part of every second I am for you. And all the seconds of tomorrow when you hurt again all you have to do is look with your heart to see how much you are loved by me and I will take care of you.
Even now I have hand picked your mother and father to be with you for this very moment . It is my love for you that your mother is at your door worried about how you feel.
Sure enough her mom was there. .
At first she wanted to be left alone but now she knew that her parents were a part of the tiny loves sent from GOD who loves her so much.
And she did have her party, it wasn’t what she had dreamed, I mean it consisted of her dorky brother, two sisters and her parents, but she did have fun and most of all she saw it was all put together by her heavenly Papa that loves her so much.
That night after her dad tucked her in and shared with her a story Jesus told about a guy who had a party and no one came, she laid in bed, and prayed,
“Father what a day, my heart still hurts, but I do see you are right in the center of everything and my hurt is deep in the center of your huge love for me. Thank you for the tiny little's of your love that are so huge when I need them most . Thank you that I can see you hold my heart, and the me, just the way I am, you love me, love me, love me.
I’m going sleep in you Jesus, in your love, amen and night, night.”